Leave It

Leave it.

One of my coaching clients shared that this was her theme for herself this week. 

Rather than obsess, perseverate, or allow a wayward thought to cycle again and again through her head, she told herself, Leave it!

It was helping her let go. Move on. Focus on something else.

Could you use an affirmation like that?

As in, when you can’t keep yourself from sending that one last text. From making that one last not-so-nice comment to your partner or spouse. From worrying about that thing happening at work. From telling your child one more thing when you’ve already given them a big, long list. 

In writing, we call this writing past the ending.

As in, when a piece ends, it has an appropriate closure, but then you keep going. You explain further. You reiterate your points. You hit the reader over the head with a two-by-four. 

Where in your life do you write past the ending?

It could be staying in a relationship longer than you should. Staying in a job longer than you should. Eating one more cookie than you need. 

It could be those few extra bites of dinner after you are already full. That extra task you take on for someone else because you think they are overwhelmed. That toxic friendship you cling to longer than is healthy. 

Imagine at the top of a piece of paper, you write “Leave It.” 

What or who belongs on your list?

I should have done this the other day with my son. He and I were texting back and forth and I was irritated about something. So I sent one or two more texts than I should. 

I wrote past the ending.

And then I regretted it. 

Imagine if you actually stopped where you should stop. What happens when you do Leave it!? What is possible from there?

When we Leave it, it creates space. Space for something else to emerge. Space for air that you can take in. Space to turn to whatever is next instead of staying caught in that old thing that you were attached to. 

Space for healing.

Space for a new perspective on what it’s like on the other side.

I have shared before in a blog about the concept of Stay. There are fight or flight moments in life where we might want to abandon ship. Where we want to leave. We want to take off, for the thing to end. 

In those cases, the thing might be ending sooner than it should. 

But just like there are times for Stay, there are times for Leave it.

We have friends who have a Standard Poodle. It’s a giant dog. When this dog wants to play fetch with you, you do it. And whenever this dog is dashing across the lawn after a rabbit, or sticking his nose in something he shouldn’t, or barking at the UPS man, his owner says firmly, “Rudder, Leave it!”

In the dog training world, this is a high value cue. It’s a superhero-level recall for any dog that loves to chase after a curious object.

Where might you need superhero recall to call yourself back from something?

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